Today, I’m sharing my thoughts about being different and standing out in a crowded space. I know it’s not a health-related topic, but I won’t always talk about healthy living topics.
These days, I share more about motivation and inspiration, and I decided I will write about whatever I want because I have to be me. You’ll learn more after reading further in this post.
This week, Jeff Goins published a blog post and podcast, sharing his thoughts about being successful (innovative) while being different. Jeff is an accomplished writer and author, and I started following him a few months ago.
Jeff shared many golden nuggets in his podcast, but after listening to his 53-minute podcast, I took to the keyboard to write.
Comparing Slows Growth & Success
Most of you know that I am a coach; I paid for training, and the cost was substantial. But what you don’t know is that I am not a successful coach. I attribute not being successful to many things, but two reasons why are because of comparison and not putting in the work to achieve success.
The Come-to-Jesus Moment
One day, I had a heart-to-heart talk with my husband, and he imparted excellent advice, which I heard, but never received until recently. My husband said, “If you really wanted to do coaching, you would do what it takes to be successful, you haven’t done it. I don’t think you really want to do coaching. Because if you wanted to do that type of business, you would do it; period.”
Mr. Parham held nothing back, and I felt like a little kid being scolded, but I knew what he said was the unadulterated truth.
Just Watching
For too long, I’ve observed what other coaches do, while comparing, always changing and tweaking things, but that gets old if you do it for too long. At some point, it has to stop. While listening to Jeff, I had a moment of enlightenment, in which I was brutally honest with myself.
I looked deep within and got the answers. The funny thing is I didn’t need to find any clues because the answers were always there; they were just buried.
I promised myself that I would dare to be different, and I would not compare my success to others (what I perceive as success). I am no longer afraid of what people think because this time, it’s about being different, unabashedly me.
Comparison is not only the thief of joy (Theodore Roosevelt), but it also slows your personal growth, which hinders success.
Where to Go from Here
I’m walking on a different path, and I don’t care what others think. Writing has always been my first love, and it all started with the first short story contest I entered in high school. Although my skills aren’t where they should be, I’m willing to work hard to improve.
Doing It Well
Many people say, “Follow your passion.” But I don’t believe in following your passion. First, you must know you are good at what you do, and you need to like it. Second, you must be willing to put in the necessary work it takes to be successful. If you don’t like what you ‘think’ you’re good at, then you’ll wing it and winging it isn’t something that is easily hidden. It eventually comes to light.
Embrace Being Different
I’m slightly afraid of taking a different path, but I am up for the adventure. Here’s what I’m doing to not get caught in the comparison trap.
-I’ll pursue what I’m good at, even if it means hiring someone to assist me.
- Commit to writing every day.
- Offer to consult and not to coach.
- Consistency with publishing blog posts.
- Marketing myself more(on and offline).
- Just create content without worrying about what people think.
- Do it!
Stand out and be different, after all, you are an original.
Discussion
Why do you think a lot of us play the comparison game? Share your comments below. -Thanks a bunch!!
Mitch Mitchell says:
There you go, you get it! It’s okay to see what others are doing, both for enjoyment and to see if you can borrow some of it for your benefit. Using it to make yourself feel small does nothing but keep you down. Your husband was right on this point, if you don’t really feel it then it’s not what you want to do in the first place. I’m proud of your growth and your coming out party; good for you! 🙂
Evelyn Parham says:
Thanks, Mitch!
I’m learning it’s better to be different than to try to do what others are doing.
I appreciate your comment! 🙂
Trinity says:
This blog post is right on time and confirmation. I have been giving MUCH thought to “ comparison and not fitting in”. I had even begun to write about it, but never finished. I believe that some of us don’t “fit in” because God has ordained something uniquely within us that causes us to always display whatever it is that is different. Someone once said that “different is not necessarily wrong; different is just different ‘’. Therefore, we must learn to accentuate and celebrate that which makes us uniquely different. Trying to fit in and be a carbon copy of someone else or what is deemed as a societal norm is like trying to place a square peg into a round opening. It will never properly fit! Thanks for the reminder that we are originals. Continue to do you, and be blessed!
Evelyn Parham says:
Hey Trinity!
You should finish your article; I’d love to read it. 🙂
Thanks for adding to the discussion because your words truly hit home and speak volumes.
Take care, my friend!!